3 Things Baristas, Don't Want to Discuss & 9 Brighter Topics of Conversation:

When I'm on the clock, it's all about the job. Who I am, what I think and believe,has to fall away. I need to provide a premiere experience for my guest. Of course, there are topics my guests should know are off limits. These things include:

1. Saying hateful things about other races, religions, or sexual identities. I'll try not to be a jerk, but silence is tacit agreement.

2. Trying to convert me to another faith. There is literally no polite way to tell someone “No”. Even if I personally appreciated the injection of faith into my work day, I'm responsible for other employees who may be uncomfortable with this.

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3. Trying to sell makeup, jewelry, or any direct sales item to me or my co-workers. Why are you pressuring someone who has to be nice to you to buy something they probably can’t afford?

Friendly reminder: please avoid the above three subjects with hospitality, food service, and retail staff.

Now you know, we don't want to hear about controversial subjects particularly when our jobs prohibit us from contributing to the conversation. Some suggestions I have when you want to make conversation with your serving staff:

1. Keep it light and breezy with some smooth weather conversation.

2. Talk about you. I like hearing about your kids/grand kids/ nephews or nieces /pets. I like hearing you have a promotion or that your friend is visiting .

3. Tell me about a trip you took. This is especially popular if you did something on a thrifty budget I might be able to mimic.

4. Tell me about your new diet, sugar substitute, milk substitute, or update me on how your pursuit of gluten free is going. Personally, I know a lot about healthy eating and different dieting techniques, but more generally, service people are always running into special diets and allergies. Most of us are interested in hearing more about why we're making drinks a special way. If it's a diet we want to know if it was effective. Hearing about your allergies or struggles can help us deliver a safer allergy free food to you.

5. Talk about a food or product you like. I'm in retail/food service. Stuff like that is kind of my wheel house.

6. Tell me about a book, movie, or TV show. We're all watching popular media, chances are good I've seen it or heard of it. Even if I don't know it, you might be introducing me to something new I could be enjoying.

7. Tell me about something local that's going on. There's always a farmer's market, fair, play, or some other local flavor I'd like to know more about.

8. Feel free to talk about your holiday plans. This is a way to positively share your faith and include us in a way that doesn't pressure us to make any statements about our faith. We all want to hear about a fun party! Graduations, weddings, and birthday parties are fun celebrations we also like hearing about.

9. Give us a complement. I love recommending my hair stylist (Cost Cutters all the way!), telling you where I got my $1.50 eyeliner, or how I like my brand of khaki pants. My one caveat is to be careful NOT to slide into hitting on us. Personally, I've never enjoyed this kind of attention, though the jury is out on whether this is generally welcome in the industry.

Finally, please look for your best opportunity to speak with us. There's quite a few regulars I enjoy talking to, but no matter how curious I am about their trip to Alaska or how long it's been since I've seen them, I'm way too stressed/busy to chat with them if there is a line. When traffic is heavy please refrain from starting a conversation with us. If you're enjoying a chat but new guests arrive: please understand if we have to cut you short. It's not you, it's the job.

Join the Conversation:

-Has someone ever said something inappropriate to you while you were working and what did you do?

-Are there any places you visit regularly to say “Hi” to the team? What did they do that created that feeling of connection for you?

-Did I miss another fun light topic you like to bring up with service workers?

Enjoy this post and want to read more like it?  Try: The Dumbest Question You Could Ask Your Barista

March in Review and Plans For April

I've been running this blog since March 7^th. In that time I've published 10 posts and had a little over 300 website hits. That's about 10 hits a day or 30 hits per post. Both seem respectable for the first month running. First month is more a baseline to build on than a useable metric.

I got the most hits on March 25^th . On that particular day I re-tweeted an older post AND I added a new post to my blog. I only got 15 page views total. Moving forward, it's clear I need to continue to increase my online presence and push for higher visibility. Some things I'm implementing:

Based off these Successes in April I will:

1. Increase participation in twitter. I don't know how useful twitter is. There is a learning curve in how to best use this tool and I;m very much still learning. The limited of 140 word and applications that allow for easy post scheduling make it stupid not to further explore this tool.
2. Reaching out to some google + communities. I've been reading and responding to some blogging communities, but I haven't been promoting my own blog in community as I should.
3. Pictures. Online readers are looking for more visuals in the media they are consuming. Adding two or three visuals to my work is like twenty minutes more work, but people say it increases conversion ten fold. I'm going to test it out.
4. Maintaining a presence in the community. I've only been here a month, and I'm already establishing connections with others through commenting, re-sharing, and participating in conversations happening. Hopefully I'm building something positive that will continue to steadily grow.

My most popular posts this month: “Does Your Kid Have the Caffeine Bug?” “6 Steps to Slim DownYou White Mocha Without Ruining the Experience” and “Area toFocus in and Becoming a Niche Writer—Come Again?”

The biggest things to note: these articles are not actually my three best written, most informative, or most tagged with keywords. What they have in common: all three were commented on by a blogger more established than me. So thanks Christian Touchet, Luna Darcy, Alisha Trost, and Kellie-AnnRussell for increasing my visibility!

Things that are working for me writing wise:

-List style writing. It seems more popular to write a list and have a title TELLING the reader there's only X level of investment you need to get through this piece.

-Quick Turn around. I have a back log of potential posts for my blog. I have six posts on deck. And countless other ideas to implement and try.

Stuff I Need to Work On:

-Too many words per post.

-Creating more links both outside the blog and within it. References helps to build overall quality of work—even if it takes more time to write.     

8 Secrets I Wish I knew About Writing While I Was In High School

via flickr Creative Common License thanks 

1. Keep writing! Writing is more of a compulsion than a passion. Don't bog yourself down by holding it in. The more you write the better you will get.

2. Your writing is not perfect especially if no one else has had a chance to critique it. In my teens, I'd spend all my time writing ignoring school, friends, and family For the record, this is not a healthy way to live. While you should definitely carve out time for writing in your life, doing it at the exclusion of all else is going to close off experiences and knowledge. In retrospect, it set me up to feel like my writing had to be at a certain level just because of all the other stuff I moved to the side. No one needs that kind of pressure. Trust me, first attempts are going to flop don’t give up a good Algebra grade for it.

Don’t be more interested in arguing how good what you wrote is than listening to constructive feedback. The person reading your work is only providing input because they see something worth refining. Critiques signal that the reviewer found value in your work. Get out of your own way and be open to what people were suggesting.

The first copy you show people, no matter how polished, is STILL A DRAFT. Entering with that mind set is going to be unspeakably helpful to receiving critique and to improving your work.

3. Remember all writing is collaborative. I was and am really into Emily Dickenson and she was a hermit! She never had to speak to or be reviewed/corrected by a single soul, surely I could expect the same. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

• Ms. Dickenson wrote solely for herself. She never had any intention of publishing, it was only after her death that her family wanted that for her writing.

• When her work was first published someone else edited the living heck out of it so it would conform to poetic standards of the time. We read the original today, but for a long time a stranger, with no input from the author, decided what was meant by the work and how best to present it.

• Ms. Dickenson wasn't around to see her work thrive.

Dive into the community by:

• Joining a local writers' group. This will give you a group of objective people to critique your work. It will also give you a chance to be the critic. You may be more able to avoid common writing traps now that you've seen it in others' writing.

• Get a Blog. This creates a potentially worldwide presence that establishes you as a writer with experience in X style. Weekly posts will show others your discipline and commitment to your craft.

4. Start building a portfolio. Any peer reviewed, relevant final work can go into a portfolio, but it will carry more weight as a high graded paper, a contest winning work, or a published work. This will increase your community engagement, prepare you to apply for work, and help build your confidence.

• Submit a piece for publication. Check out if you school has publication opportunities. Look into magazine submissions and online posting opportunities. It is never too early to be published or to learn about the submission process. DO NOT let fear hold you back. Life will go on with either a “yes” or a “no” and there is a lot to learn from both answers.

• Submit your work to writing contests. Do a little research and make a splash in the writer's community by becoming a contest winning author!

5. Get some references/testimonials. Talk to your English teacher, writing coach, or even a peer and have them write a review for your work. Even if you are not a contest winner , a reference from a creditable person about your talent can go a long way in helping you get what you want.

It's great practice telling people what your goals are and asking them for help in getting what you want.

6. Don't let “no” scare you off. I expected everyone to just acknowledge my literary genius. Really? It was conceited. I expected all the doors to be open. Hearing “no” was particularly crushing in this context.

There are going to be a million “No's” to your writing BUT it's not a rejection of you or your talent. “No” is a business decision for that group at that time. It could mean their budget was cut, it could mean your work is right for five or six future things but not this one thing right now, or it could just mean competition was fierce and there's more work for you to do. Nobody automatically thinks an actor, dancer, or singer is bad when the hiring team says “no” to them, writing is very much the same way.

I've found going in and expecting “no” helpful. It makes me look for reasons people would say no and build arguments against it. It also makes hearing “yes” amazing while making “no” just so much background noise.

7. Be open to a lot of directions with your writing career. Career day showcases a lot of traditional career paths. How to be a police officer or a small business owner is a pretty clear to most people. Even how to be an actor, musician, singer, or novelist, while a hard path, is pretty well understood by the general populace. The options as a writer are a little more obscure.

Freelance work is really a broad and varied world. Do you want to run a blog, do you want to be a technical writer, do you want to pitch creative ads and marketing techniques, do you want to professionally write reviews, do you want to run e-courses and coaching sessions for other writers, or do you want to do something else? There are a lot of options for creative innovative aspiring writers and the formula to get there is pretty fluid.

8. Consider community college. I'm not going to say college is a waste to the aspiring writer, because it's not. I made my greatest improvements to my writing style in college. If I'd had a greater sense of purpose, I would have made some amazing networking connection in college. I'm pretty sure I have my day job because I hold a degree. College DOES earn you some things. However, what I got out of the experience does not validate the price tag for my four year degree. If I could do it all over again, I would have gone to community college and worked. I would have had less debt and would have taken advantage of more opportunities while I was there. I would have had more time and experience to learn what I needed to do to get the most from a four year degree program.

There is a lot of pressure to go to college and get a traditional 4 year away from home experience. I know the college “experience” has been elevated to an almost mythical status through our cultural narrative. Although the opportunity for education and growth may still be unparalleled by a traditional 4 year college, you have to know and take full advantage of almost every opportunity presented to you to make up for the cost.

Does your opinion differ from mine? Did I leave something out or put something horrible in the list? Leave your own advice and feedback to would be writers below!

The Dumbest Question You Could Ask Your Barista

If you've ever asked a barista, waiter, bartender, or cashier if they “like their job”, you may be stressing your server out for no real reason. Exactly how do you want your service person to answer the question and what do you really want to know

“Yes” is probably a lie. I've never met someone who's fulfilled by working the bottom tier service industry. In a roundabout way the job might make them happy. It might provide the schedule to do something creative/educational in the background. Maybe, it’s an opportunity to make connections that they are hoping to leverage into a better career or a better living space.

“No” is a whole other dangerous can of worms. What if your boss overhears you? It sounds dumb. The boss shouldn't care if you're happy so long as you do your job, but they care. Every guest complaint is your fault because you're giving out the vibe you're not happy here. And you need to be more grateful you have a job and are getting paid.

If you're a manager, it's even more deadly to tell a guest you don't like your job. All your employees will hear you and think to themselves “Well my boss doesn't even like this job, so this place is just terrible and I should leave” or “My boss doesn't even care so I don't have to do a good job.” Yeah, being happy and caring about a job are not the same thing, but you'd be surprised how often the two are confused.

Saying “no, I don't like this job” could be seen as a backhanded expression of “no I don't like serving you”. A guest might be offended, ascend offending a guest is about the worse thing you can do.

Why do you care if we like our jobs? Are you going to leave your career and join the minimum wage service industry?

Honestly, do people come to where you work and randomly ask you if you like your job? How would you feel if a random stranger entered your work space, had you do a bunch of tasks which you did as cheerfully and effectively as you could and mid way through asked “do you like working here?” Does it sound mildly like a threat to your security no matter the inflection?

Next time, ask what you really want to know like “is it fun to work the espresso machine” or “it must be nice to know so much about wine pairing” or whatever the heck it is that you thought made this job fun/cool. It's kind of nice to be reminded of the sweet parts of the gig and it's always makes my day to hear that someone else has an appreciation for the way I handle part of my job.

If you're looking for work for your teen, then just open with that. Most people will let you know the minimum hiring age for their store and are often TOO open about whether or not it's realistic for a teen to work their job. There is a lot to consider when hiring teens, but I do find that often my employees will chase away possible candidates based off what THEY do on the job that a teen legally couldn't do. As a manager, I'd make space for a teen to work a shift. The right teenager brings a bubbly enthusiasm, speed and friendliness to guest service that can rejuvenate the rest of the staff and can be hard to find in a more seasoned worker.

For the record, I hesitate to hire teens whose parents or family are job hunting for them. It signals to me that the teen doesn't really want the job or the teen isn't competent enough to handle the job.

If you're using “do you like your job” as a segway to offer us a job, just present the opportunity. Don't play games with us about whether or not this is all we see ourselves doing with our lives. Remember, everyone in the service industry is underemployed. We all have skills and talents that go way beyond filling your order, taking your money, making wine suggestions, or scanning items. Give us the credit that you would a chimp and acknowledge we're at minimum bored and frustrated. Just like you wouldn't bang on the glass in the monkey house, don't waste our time with a stupid invasive question.

Opening Up the Conversation:

-Have you asked people in the service industry if they like their jobs and if so why?

-Have you ever seen a skill in a service person that made you think, this person could do more than this?

-Have you ever offered a job to or hired someone who was serving you?

-If you work in the service industry, have you ever been asked if you like your job and how did you handle it?

-If you don't work in the service industry, has anyone asked you if you like your job and what was the context?

-Do you love your job or industry and if so what do you do?